I recently conducted a social experiment where I asked a few people what came to mind when I said the word “empathy”. Their responses ranged from: “touchy-feely ugh-ness” to “the softest of soft skills” to “the cornerstone of trust” to “the most important ingredient in building meaningful relationships”.

empathy: noun - em·pa·thy   \ ˈem-pə-thē \ – the ability to understand and share the feelings of another; “the ability to step into the shoes of another person, aiming to understand their feelings and perspectives, and to use that understanding to guide actions” – unknown

Empathy is having the ability to sense what other people are feeling and thinking.  It’s having the awareness of other people’s feelings that helps you to understand the other person’s needs, behaviours and actions. Empathy is more of an art than a science, it’s more grey than black or white, and the unspoken, non-verbal cues are often much “louder” than actual words. 

Here’s what I know to be true. Empathy is NOT weakness, it’s NOT agreement, it’s NOT sympathy, and it’s definitely NOT a skill that only women value or are good at. 

Empathy is an important skill for a workplace investigator to have. An empathetic investigator demonstrates three qualities:

• listening:  the ability to listen attentively during the investigation process is arguably the most important skill of the investigator.  Listening helps the investigator to understand the participant’s version of events and perspective.  Being listened to helps the participant feel heard, which is a powerful feeling in the investigation process.

• openness:  the investigator needs to demonstrate genuine openness during the investigation process.  If a participant feels that the investigator has already prejudged the outcome of the investigation prior to being given the opportunity to share their side of the story, the participant will view the investigation process as pointless, unfair, and biased.

• understanding:  the investigator must also work hard to understand the participant’s version of events by asking probing questions and seeking to understand the participant’s perspective.  Failing to make such an effort can result in a rushed investigation that reaches the wrong conclusion.

An investigator’s role is to find out “what happened”, to ensure that the process undertaken is fair, thorough, timely and that confidentiality is protected, to the extent possible. But an investigator should also be mindful about “how” they conduct investigations. 

Investigations are inherently very difficult processes for the participants.  The complainant (the person who filed the complaint), for example, may have been the victim of bullying, which has resulted in feelings of heightened anxiety, loss of confidence, and increased levels of emotional stress.  The respondent (the person accused of misconduct), for example, may believe that they have been wrongly accused, which has resulted in feelings of anger and resentment, fear of job loss, and concerns about how their personal and/or professional reputation will be impacted.

Empathy fosters trust, dialogue, and connection between the investigator and participants to the investigation.  An empathetic investigator can help to set the participant at ease, which can result in more accurate witness statements and disclosure of information and evidence that are critical to the investigation process. 

An empathetic investigator ensures that all participants are treated with respect, dignity and compassion throughout the investigation process.  All participants should have a full and fair opportunity to feel heard and understood, to share their version of events, and to share any evidence they believe to be important and relevant to the process.

Investigators have a responsibility to provide support to all participants in the investigation process.  An empathetic investigator can recognize the signs of a participant who is experiencing heightened levels of stress and can connect the participant with professional avenues of support. 

I’m not suggesting that empathy should take precedence over professionalism, diligence or neutrality in an investigation. I’m saying that empathy shouldn’t fall by the wayside.  I believe that you can demonstrate empathy, compassion and care, and still set clear boundaries, ask the difficult questions and maintain objectivity through the workplace investigation process. I believe that you can be empathetic without being soft. I believe that you can be an effective investigator without being an asshole. In my own workplace investigation practice, I lead with empathy. Empathy is my superpower, it’s one of my core values, it’s what sets me apart from other workplace investigators, and it hasn’t steered me wrong.

February 8, 2021

Saira Gangji is an independent licensed Workplace Investigator at hrology in Calgary, AB. She investigates allegations of discrimination and human rights, harassment, violence and misconduct in the workplace. For more information about hrology and our process, see the work with me page.